Rhonda Byrne on Law of attraction, the 17-second rule and happY is an inside job
When you’re negative or not feeling it, do nothing. Negativity is not what you want to hang out with if you’re aligning to the Law of Attraction.
Rhonda: I give ways to be free of negativity in The Secret. And then The Greatest Secret is basically completely dedicated to removing all negativity from your life. I would never answer my phone, and I never opened a single email while I was not feeling good. Because you let problems come in, right? Don’t let it in. And if somebody says, Can I have a chat with you? It’s ‘no’ – tomorrow or whatever. So that’s the first thing. Stop. Don’t let things come in.
Fearne: So you’ve struck gold with this one because, honestly, that’s like, my problem so often that I feel awful. I’m still trying to keep up with all this stuff and then let it in. That’s such a brilliant bit of practical advice, Rhonda.
Then accept your negative feelings…
Rhonda: So when a feeling arises, here is what you do. You don’t try and change it. You don’t want to fix it, you don’t want to make it go away – you welcome it. You allow it to be here. It’s only energy, just allow it. It will go boom, boom and out. And when you fully allow it — you may be 20 seconds into that emotion — it will dissolve. It just goes up in smoke.
Fearne: I need to practise this and also in my parenting, perhaps to go, ‘Right… Let’s move through that emotion,’ whatever it is. And, like you’re saying, feel that energy peak then just let it go because I don’t know if I’ve ever really consciously practised it.
I think our natural inclination is to resist everything, probably because we’ve been socially conditioned to do. I’ll even do it for my kids, which I know is not great. But if they’re freaking out, having a huge tantrum, then I’m trying to get them to simmer down like, guys, let’s just calm it down. Whereas I need to practise, also in my parenting, to go right, let’s move through that emotion, whatever it is. And, like you’re saying, feel that energy peak then just let it go because I don’t know if I’ve ever really consciously practised it
Use the 17-second shift
Rhonda: “The other thing I used was love. I’d do these rampages of everything that I loved and appreciated. It’s really great because, with thoughts, after a focus of 17 seconds, you just get heaps and heaps more thoughts of what you’re thinking about.
So I’d be like, I love the ocean and I love the blue sky and I love my dogs, and I love this and that. Then you hit the 17-second mark and you’ve got heaps of appreciating thoughts and things that you love going non-stop. When you can feel it in your body, when you can feel all that resistance that you had just melt away, then you’re good to go. You can answer the phone. You can look at emails. So that’s what I say in The Secret.
Fearne: And 17 seconds is very doable. If I can cultivate 17 seconds of gratitude or love, that’s going to really propel me in the right direction. I guess you’re talking about is really a kind of everyday inner gratitude, not about all the stuff that’s happening, but this is sort of an inside job.
Happiness is an inside job
Rhonda: It’s not something in the future because it’s not something outside of us – it’s within us. And we have tended to do that all of our life. That’s just because we’ve been conditioned: ‘I’ll be happy when…’ And so we delay being happy. We delay it. And instead of we are that right now you are all the happiness that exists right now. It is inside you right now. All you have to do is peel away some things that are not true. To allow it to come up and take over your life. In The Secret I say, the creation process is ask, believe, receive.
You’re the one and only being that has ever, ever lived. No matter what is appearing in this world, and no matter what is sort of coming into your life, you are more powerful than all of it.